INT. KING WENCESLAS CASTLE OPHELIAS BEDROOM - EVENING
Francesca and Ophelia are confined to the Princess quarters.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: For the first time in my life, I feel as though I am truly in love. I know he’s not the handsomest or
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Witty?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: No
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Or the tallest
PRINCESS OPHELIA: No
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Or good at conversation.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: No, but there is something about him. He is courageous and he would go through a brick wall to spend time with me.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: You cannot marry him Ophelia. The kingdom will not be at peace unless you marry Prince Eduardo.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Maybe he will come for me and rescue me.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: With the soldiers in this castle there is no way he could get through to you. I think he will see sense and marry people of his own kind.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: If he will not come to me then maybe I should go to him.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: It is not a woman’s place to chase after a man. Particularly a man who washes but once a year.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Oh Francesca, you don’t know what true love is. Now you are going to help me.
CUT TO:
INT. KING WENCESLAS CASTLE OPHELIAS BEDROOM - EVENING
Princess Ophelia is dressed up to look much heavier. She is concealed by a hood on her head, a scarf around her mouth and smudges of coal on her forehead. Francesca places what looks like two warts on her nose.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Oh I do hope this works or I shall be hanged in the morning. Remind me why I’m doing this.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Don’t worry Francesca, I’ll be alright.
The two women exit Ophelia’s room
INT. CORRIDOR OUTSIDE OPHELIA’S BEDROOM - EVENING
There are two soldiers guarding Ophelia’s room.
OPHELIA’S GUARD: Sorry miss I don’t remember you going in there.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: (in a coarse voice) Oh go on, give us a kiss
OPHELIA’S GUARD: I’m sorry love, it would only make the wife jealous. She doesn’t like me philandering with other women.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Your loss sonny.
The Princess and Francesca leave.
OPHELIA’S GUARD 2: I didn’t know you were married Bert.
OPHELIA’S GUARD: Thank heavens for that
EXT. SIDE OF A MOUNTAIN - EARLY MORNING
Elliot is climbing the side of a mountain. He reaches a spot high up on the mountain where there is a small stone hut.
UNCLE GERWYN: 42, male, thin, partly bald with dark hair and a long beard, wearing rags.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Uncle Gerwyn?
Elliot enters the hut where Uncle Gerwyn is asleep
INT. UNCLE GERWYN’S STONE HUT - EARLY MORNING
Uncle Gerwyn is lying asleep on the floor of the hut
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Uncle Gerwyn, I have come because I want to be a hermit like you.
Uncle Gerwyn awakes
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I want to believe in god and walk among birds and trees and rabbits and...
Uncle Gerwyn does not speak points out the door.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: What is it? You want me to build my own hut?
Uncle Gerwyn continues pointing
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Is it the stonework? It’s very good. I’d like to build a magnificent building like this myself one day.
Uncle Gerwyn is exasperated.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Shall I boil some water. We could have hot water for breakfast and I could catch some pidgeon.
Again Uncle Gerwyn is frustrated
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Who doesn’t like pidgeon?
EXT. FOREST NEAR KING WENCESLAS CASTLE - NIGHT
Princess Ophelia and Francesca are walking through the forest alone
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: It’s not too late to turn back. This forest could be haunted. There could be thieves and...
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Don’t worry we’ll be alright. Elliot will rescue us
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: If he was a hundred miles from here he wouldn’t be able to rescue us. Do we even know where to find him.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: First we have to get as far away from the castle as we possibly can, then we shall worry about how to find him.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Have you really thought this through. Even if you do find him a princess becoming a peasant is far harder than a peasant becoming a princess.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Whatever do you mean?
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: You’ll have to do chores. Scrub floors and learn how to sow.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Ooh
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Feed pigs and chickens
PRINCESS OPHELIA: That’s not so bad
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: You’ll have to get by with no more than one or two dresses.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Why that’s horrid
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: The life of a peasant is so much harder. You have to make sacrifices and get by helping others more than yourself
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Helping others?
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Are you sure Princess that this is worth it? What happens if you can’t stand each other after a couple of weeks? Maybe he smells. Maybe he can’t talk about the things you want to talk about.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Well I shall try
Suddenly Francesca and Ophelia slide down the side of an incline. At the bottom they find their dresses are covered in mud.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Oh no. I’m completely ruined.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: We could go back and have a hot bath and sleep in a comfortable bed.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: I sure do hope Elliot doesn’t see me like this.
EXT. MEDIEVAL VILLAGE - DAY
Elliot is helping his father with work when Edwina approaches.
EDWINA FURSTENBURG: Elliot, myself and Harrison were talking last night. We think that it is the right time for you to find a woman of your own - not a Princess. Someone who has a similar upbringing and who will appreciate you for who you are.
Elliot doesn’t respond.
EDWINA FURSTENBURG: I have arranged for three such unspoken for women to meet with you. You can choose the girl who most pleases you.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Mother, I can’t
EDWINA FURSTENBURG: Why not? Think of the family name. It will be lost without grandchildren.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I want to live a life as a hermit, like Uncle Gerwyn. I can still learn to be a blacksmith, but I’ve talked it through with Gerwyn
EDWINA FURSTENBURG: That idiot brother of mine doesn’t even talk
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I have found ways of communicating with him. It will be good for me spiritually. I will be closer to God.
EDWINA FURSTENBURG: And what’s God ever done for you?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: The air that I breathe, the scenery, the kindness of people...
EDWINA FURSTENBURG: Harrison, next thing you know that son of ours will want to play the harp. What is this village coming to?
EXT. OUTSIDE MALACHY'S DWELLING - DAY
Elliot greets Malachy outside his house.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Malachy I have returned.
MALACHY: So I see
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Megreth said that the Onococha plant is inside me. I had promised it to you. Do you know how to extract it?
MALACHY: The Onococha plant is not what Megreth thought it was. I told you it is a blessing and a curse. It only has the power to open your eyes.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: But in order to open my eyes it made me blind in the first place.
MALACHY: Have you learned nothing?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: A pauper can’t marry a princess? Some people don’t like poetry? Some tigers can talk? Don’t mess with an old witch?
MALACHY: What will you do now?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I plan to live a life of celibacy. I want to make my Uncle Gerwyn proud. Without the help of his god, I would not be able to see and walk properly.
INT. KING WENCESLAS CASTLE DINING ROOM - MORNING
King Wenceslas and some of his subordinates are seated in the main hall and are served breakfast by the staff.
KING WENCESLAS: Where is Ophelia? Why has she not come to breakfast?
The servant King Wenceslas addresses is nervous
SERVANT: Sir, she is not in her room. We cannot find her.
KING WENCESLAS: Send for Francesca
SERVANT: She cannot be found either
King Wenceslas pounds his fist against the table.
KING WENCESLAS: Why doesn’t my daughter do as she is told? Can’t she see that I am doing what is best for her?
QUEEN GERTRUDE: What’s best for her or what’s best for the kingdom?
KING WENCESLAS: This is your doing
QUEEN GERTRUDE: I wish it was
KING WENCESLAS: Where is she?
QUEEN GERTRUDE: How should I know? Most likely she has escaped from this dungeon.
KING WENCESLAS: Chesterton, I want at least three patrols combing the forest for her. Word better not get out that she is missing.
CHESTERTON: Consider it done master.
Chesterton leaves the main hall
CUT TO:
EXT. OUTSIDE KING WENCESLAS CASTLE - MORNING
Forty soldiers on horseback exit the castle and gather two hundred yards outside, where Chesterton addresses them.
CHESTERTON: Rodrigues, you will take ten men and search the south quadrant, Sanchez, you will take ten men and search the north quadrant and Gaston you will take ten men and search the west quadrant. Myself Rubert and Chavelier and the rest will take the east quadrant
Chesterton and his aides gallop ahead
CUT TO:
EXT. COUNTRYSIDE NEAR HABERNACLE CASTLE - DAY
Chesterton and his aides come to a stop in the woods.
RUBERT: Master, you seem agitated. I didn’t think you thought well of the princess?
CHESTERTON: Well of her? I would like to ring her neck.
RUBERT: Then why, the east quadrant?
CHESTERTON: She has most likely gone to the village where Furstenburg came from.
RUBERT: Aren’t you forgetting something?
CHESTERTON: What?
RUBERT: Maybe her sense of direction isn’t much better than my wife’s
CHESTERTON: Rubert, let me do the thinking.
EXT. FOREST NEAR ELLIOTS VILLAGE - NIGHT
Chesterton’s subjects are sitting around a campfire while he and Rubert are several dozen yards away.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 1: I hear that if we return the Princess, there could be a bonus for us.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 2: How much
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 1: Two shillings.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 2: Wow. What would you do with two shillings?
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 1: I’d buy myself the fastest horse in the kingdom.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 3: I’d find myself the prettiest wench I could find.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 2: Two shillings eh? I’d pay for a nice warm bath. The missus is always complaining that I smell of horse sweat and hay and she always has the most splitting of headaches. If I could just have one night and show her...
CHESTERTON: There won’t be any bonuses for you lot.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 1: Why not sir?
CHESTERTON: Because we’re going to execute her.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 3: I hope its not going to be me. I do hate executions.
CHESTERTON: What was that?
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 3: Yippee. We’ll find her and squeeze her tyrannical neck.
EXT. FOREST A MILE FROM ELLIOTS VILLAGE - DAY
Lorimer and Elliot are walking through the forest
LORIMER: So, just like that you are going to become a hermit?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: It’s time Lorimer that I faced up to the fact that I will never be able to marry the princess without the Kings blessing.
LORIMER: You’ll be bored after five minutes.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Not everybody marries the woman of their dreams.
LORIMER: But nobody dreams of being a hermit
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I will be closer to the earth, the rocks, the wind...
LORIMER: Next thing you know you’ll turn into a poet.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Lorimer, you should follow your own heart. The love of my life does not want me and I accept that, but you have a chance to be truly happy.
LORIMER: What if she doesn’t want me? What if she humiliates me?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Lorimer, if she is worth it, she will not humiliate you and if she is the right girl or bird for you, then she will see you as you want her to see you.
LORIMER: Maybe your days as a poet are not numbered.
EXT. FOREST NEAR ELLIOTS VILLAGE - DAY
Francesca and Ophelia are walking through the forest
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Can’t we rest up for a bit Princess?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Please don’t call me Princess. There might be someone listening.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: What should I call you?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: How about...
The sound of horses approaching can be heard. The Princess and Francesca hide. The horses come closer.
CHESTERTON: We know you’re here. Come on out Princess.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: There’s no Princess here, you oaf
CHESTERTON: Come out
The Princess and Francesca eventually come out from hiding
RUBERT: She’s the Princess’ maid. Who is the girl?
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: Just an ugly peasant girl
CHESTERTON: She’s the Princess idiot.
RUBERT: And I thought Prince Eduardo was a lucky guy.
CHESTERTON: Now, what will we do with you? A good hanging? I was always partial to a beheading myself.
Two soldiers dismount and try to apprehend Ophelia.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: I am not Princess Ophelia
RUBERT: You have the voice of a princess
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Wait till the King hears about this?
CHESTERTON: But he won’t hear about it. Will he lads? All those years pandering to a spoilt brat who called me Fred.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Elliot will rescue me?
CHESTERTON: The blind man?
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 1: He probably weighs twenty stone now
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 2: Maybe he lost his good leg?
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 3: He’s probably deaf as a post
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 2: He’ll probably be crawling on his hands and knees
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 3: If he has any knees left.
CHESTERTON’S SUBORDINATE 1: I’d bet if he appeared now, I could beat him with one hand tied behind my back.
FRANCESCA DA SILVA: You can’t take her. Leave her alone
Francesca tries to pull Ophelia away
Francesca is struck by a soldier and falls to the ground
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Unhand her.
The Princess struggles with two soldiers.
Elliot appears and unsheathes his sword
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Unhand the fair maiden.
A fight ensues between Elliot and eight soldiers. Six of them are wounded and amble away. Rubert and Chesterton fall off their horses and run away in fear.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: We’d better bring you to safety Francesca. And your friend.
Elliot reaches out a hand to the Princess
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: And what is your name?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Ferandina
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Come with us.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Do you come to the aid of all women in distress?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: It seemed like the right thing to do
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Do you not know who I am?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Is your name not Ferandina?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Oh it is. It is.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Why, you look very like the Princess Ophelia, except that well eh..
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Except what?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Except that she is to be married to a Prince and she wouldn’t be caught dead in this neck of the woods.
Princess Ophelia removes her warts
PRINCESS OPHELIA: I am Princess Ophelia.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: What are you doing here?
Francesca throws an apple at Elliot’s head.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Do you have a beloved?
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Now I have devoted myself to living the life of a hermit. I live with my uncle on the mountain of odour. I have turned my back on a career as a blacksmith and the possibility of marrying another. My Uncle has enlightened me. You must be late for your wedding. They say your Prince is extremely handsome.
Francesca tosses another apple at his head
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Yes he is.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Your dress is very un-princess like
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Well it is the new look back at the castle. Trends change quite quickly.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Do you need an escort to bring you back to the castle?
Francesca throws another apple at Elliot’s head.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I didn’t think there were all that many apples in this neck of the woods.
Lorimer emerges from behind a bush.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Why there you are Lorimer. Did you find anything interesting while hiding behind that bush?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Do you like music Elliot
LORIMER: He prefers poetry. He really is a terrible poet.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Please do give me an example
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I gave up poetry.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Please, let me hear your poetry.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: They were all written for you Princess, but that ship has long since sailed.
LORIMER: Please don’t ask him for an example. My ears can’t take any further punishment.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Thou art as radiant as the stars. If i could reach the moon I would give it to you. Just to see you everyday anew.
Francesca throws another apple at his head.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: That was interesting.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Why, that’s the nicest thing anybody has said about my work. Are you sure you don’t need help getting back to the castle
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Oh don’t mind me. I must be going. Come on Francesca.
Ophelia and Francesca retreat into the forest and Lorimer and Elliot walk in the opposite direction.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: She is truly beautiful. Prince Eduardo is a very lucky guy. Uncle Gerwyn has taught me many things but I’m not sure if I can ever get over losing her.
LORIMER: I didn’t think that Uncle Gerwyn spoke to anyone.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: He doesn’t but we can communicate in many different ways. When he jumps up and down, he is expressing his love for his fellow man. And when he tears his hair out he is giving thanks to god.
LORIMER: Dare I say it, but didn’t you pass up an opportunity just now.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Lorimer, my eyes are open now. If the Princess doesn’t want me or prefers another man to me, who am I to interfere. Uncle Gerwyn has taught me much.
INT. KING WENCESLAS CASTLE MAIN BEDROOM - MORNING
Prince Galahad enters the royal bedroom where the king is waking up.
PRINCE GALAHAD: Father I have great news.
KING WENCESLAS: This better be worth it.
PRINCE GALAHAD: Oh it is
KING WENCESLAS: Has Princess Ophelia returned?
PRINCE GALAHAD: No Father
KING WENCESLAS: Has the court jester been beheaded?
PRINCE GALAHAD: No Father
KING WENCESLAS: Well, spit it out boy
PRINCE GALAHAD: I am engaged to be married
KING WENCESLAS: To a commoner?
PRINCE GALAHAD: No, to a Princess
KING WENCESLAS: Let me guess. Liliput?
PRINCE GALAHAD: No Father
KING WENCESLAS: Bravia?
PRINCE GALAHAD: No Father, Octavia.
KING WENCESLAS: Octavia? Why that’s the biggest of all the kingdoms. Son, this is good news. Nobody will mess with us now. And I had you figured for a lost cause who no woman would want to set eyes upon.
PRINCE GALAHAD: Wait until you see my beloved.
EXT. KING WENCESLAS CASTLE - DAY
Prince Caspian and his soldiers arrive at the castle.
Prince Caspian whispers in the ear of General Mousta
GENERAL MOUSTA: Handover the Princess or we will fight to the death
KING WENCESLAS: The Princess isn’t here
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER ONE: Pull the other one
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER TWO: You mean we’ve come all this way and she isn’t even here?
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER ONE: My corns are killing me
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER TWO: I could do with a drink of water
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER ONE: Or some ale
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER TWO: Or a fine wench
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER ONE: Now you’re talking
GENERAL MOUSTA: Is she really gone?
KING WENCESLAS: We don’t know where she is
GENERAL MOUSTA: What do we do now then?
KING WENCESLAS: Would you like to come in for a cup of tea?
GENERAL MOUSTA: He doesn’t drink tea
KING WENCESLAS: Some ale then?
GENERAL MOUSTA: What kind of ale?
KING WENCESLAS: Ironbrew
GENERAL MOUSTA: Anything else?
PRINCE CASPIAN FOOT SOLDIER ONE: We could be here all night.
INT. KING WENCESLAS CASTLE DINING ROOM
King Wenceslas, Prince Caspian, General Mousta and Prince Galahad are all seated
PRINCESS CASPIAN: Let me get this straight. She left the comfort of the castle in the middle of the night, in the muck and the rain to go chasing after a peasant who lives on the far side of a treacherous forest and with no rations.
KING WENCESLAS: Yes my friend
PRINCE CASPAR: Women eh? I’ll be darned if I can understand them.
EXT. OUTSIDE GERWYN’S STONE HUT - EARLY MORNING
Princess Ophelia appears in front of Elliot when he ventures out of Gerwyn’s stone hut in the early hours of the morning.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG; Princess Ophelia? It’s you isn’t it. What are you doing here?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Prince Eduardo and I are no more.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Who is it now? Prince Nero?
PRINCESS OPHELIA: No
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Prince Manesco
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Prince Elliot.
Elliot sinks to his knees
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I have dreamed of this day for many many years. Thou art as radiant as the stars...
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Let’s get one thing straight. I hate poetry. If you are to win my heart you are going to have to learn to play the lute or a harp or something.
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: For you Princess. Anything.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Now stand up.
Two birds fly around above their heads.
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Why, two delightful birds
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Something tells me that they have found their match.
They kiss
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: I can’t wait till we are married and have nine children.
The camera starts to pan out
PRINCESS OPHELIA: Let’s just stop at one
ELLIOT FURSTENBURG: Five would be a good compromise
In the background Uncle Gerwyn is jumping up and down with joy.