EXT. OUTSIDE ABANDONNED SCHOOL - 5:15PM
Jackson sees the three teenagers leave the school grounds.
JACKSON: That’s them. He must be inside the school.
SATIR: He better not be dead
JACKSON: I thought you wanted to kill him
SATIR: Better by my hand. I want people to say, there goes Satir Adumba the man who killed President Bungle and freed his country.
VIC: Hey man, wouldn’t you prefer to make money from this venture? In the right hands, President Bungle could be worth hundreds of thousands of Bungles.
SATIR: Whose hands exactly?
VIC: How about Karl Manford?
SATIR: Who is Karl Manford?
VIC: He’s the leader of the Anti Bungle’s Terrorist Unit.
SATIR: So how much do you think will he give us?
VIC: Who knows. I know where the Anti Bungle’s are and I can lead you to him
INT. ABANDONNED SCHOOL - EVENING
The group of terrorists see President Bungle still tied to a chair
JACKSON: There he is. There I told you.
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Well it’s about time.
He then sees who has come across him
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Oh. That’s a mighthy sharp knife you’ve got there
SATIR:I sharpen it every day for occasions like this. See
He touches the edge of the blade and cuts his finger
SATIR: Damn happens every time.
JACKSON: What are we going to do Satir?
SATIR: Well damn Jackson, do you have to mention my name
JACKSON: Oh, his real name isn’t Satir, it’s Bob
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Don’t worry I have like a photographic memory that can remember faces and names in perfect detail. Memorising Bart and Samuel. See there. Your done
SATIR: It wouldn’t matter anyway. Where we’re bringing you, you’ll be lucky to last through the night.
INT. LARGE DEPARTMENT STORE - EVENING
Cherokee picks up a payphone and rings emergency services
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: Hi, I have information on the whereabouts of President Bungle. He is in an old abandonned school in Scharazoco.
EMERGENCY TECHNICIAN: What are you smoking kid. The President is where he ought to be so don’t waste my time.
The emergency technician hangs up the phone
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: He didn’t believe me.
HENRY CARTHRIGHT III: What do we do now?
ALEXANDER HOPSCOP: Run?
HENRY CARTHRIGHT III: We have nowhere to go. We failed and now we’re looking at ninety years in prison.
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: It’s all my fault I thought he would listen to reason. You guys didn’t have to help. I’m going back to the school. Otherwise he could end up rotting there on his own
HENRY CARTHRIGHT III: If he isn’t found, then we would have some chance of getting away with it.
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: Then we would be no better than he is. I don’t care about what you guys think, I’m going back to the school to set him free.
ALEXANDER HOPSCOP: Can’t you just leave a trail of donuts or burgers? He would be bound to break free of his shackles eventually.
INT. PRESIDENTIAL PALACE - EVENING
Fallulah as President Bungle has just arrived at the Presidential Palace
MILTON HARRISON: Sir, I am informed that a very important person is waiting for you in the Entertainment room.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Is it the First Lady?
MILTON HARRISON: Precisely as you know, the First Lady avoids the room and this is in fact the other very important person
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Can’t you be more specific
MILTON HARRISON: Why Mr President you have forbidden me to say
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Show me to this room
INT. ENTERTAINMENT ROOM OF PRESIDENTIAL PALACE - EVENING
Fallulah as President Bungle, sees a 34 year old woman there, whom she does not recognise.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Who are you?
CAROLYN MASON: Oh my love, let us not jest. You know I adore you.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: How could that be? Even my double chin, or my large stomach?
CAROLYN MASON: Oh you know I adore that bulging stomach of yours almost as much as your bulging biceps
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Even my wrinkly skin
CAROLYN MASON: Oh, a hundred men couldn’t keep me from you my love.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Well, I must confess that I have fallen for another.
CAROLYN MASON: What?
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Yes
CAROLYN MASON: Who is it?
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Me. There is simply nobody who can compete with me. I just love myself so much.
CAROLYN MASON: Well I’m sure you can fit me into your life as well. At least we have something in common. We both love you. Am I not beautiful?
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: There is another
CAROLYN MASON: Who?
FALLULAH: It is Milton
CAROLYN MASON: Milton?
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: You see, my former love, you could never compete with him or me. I have gone to the other side.
CAROLYN MASON: Why, I never.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Yes, I’m afraid it is never. Now, I’m afraid I have Presidential matters to attend to.
CAROLYN MASON: Well you never had Presidential matters to attend to before.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Some things are almost as important as self love.
INT. ABANDONNED SCHOOL - EVENING
Cherokee alongside Henry and Alexander arrive at the school and see that President Bungle is no longer there.
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: Where is he?
ALEXANDER HOPSCOP: Obviously he’s free
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: Then where are the secret service agents? Where are the police?
ALEXANDER HOPSCOP: Who cares? He’s not our problem anymore.
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: If he dies, we’re responsible. We have to find him.
ALEXANDER HOPSCOP: Don’t you think you’re taking this a little too seriously
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: I’m going to find him alone if necessary.
ALEXANDER HOPSCOP: Well, I’m not. What do you expect in return? A lighter prison sentence?
HENRY CARTHRIGHT III: It is the right thing to do but it could be dangerous, if he’s fallen into the wrong hands.
CHEROKEE BURUNDI: My Grandfather once told me that the right thing to do is not always the easiest thing to do. I’m going.
INT. OLD ABANDONNED MULTI STORY CAR PARK - EVENING
Satir, Jackson, Bobby Joe and Vic accompany President Bungle in mascot outfit. In front of them are four armed men.
SATIR: My name is Satir Umbelo, we have brought to you a precious cargo. We would like to speak with your leader.
IBRAHIM UTAKA: Are you having a laugh? A mascot?
SATIR: Before we reveal his identity we would like to be handsomely rewarded.
IBRAHIM UTAKA: If being handsomely rewarded means you don’t get your head blown off, then yes you will be handsomely rewarded. Now get out of my sight before I lose patience
SATIR: Remove your head
President Bungle removes his head
IBRAHIM UTAKA (Laughing) Why that looks like a doppelganger for President Bungle. His face is uncanny
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: I’ll have you know that this is the most pristine visage of anybody in the whole world. I’d give myself an eleven out of ten. Perfect cheek bones, eyes, the works. Totally irresistible
IBRAHIM UTAKA: Why, he sounds like President Bungle. Is it a robot?
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Why yes some people have compared my impeccable physique to that of a perfectly designed robot so I can see how you would be mistaken. Now if you don’t set me free I will be forced to call in the army and decimate your organisation.
IBRAHIM UTAKA: Why it is President Bungle
SATIR: Now that you see we are not joking, we would like a reward.
IBRAHIM UTAKA: Your reward will be your freedom my friends. Now skidaddle. Come, President Bungle, I will bring you to our leader.
INT. PRESIDENTIAL PALACE - EVENING
Fallulah as President Bungle checks her watch. It is almost six o’clock.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT DJUMBA: Milton, I’d like to write that dear old lady Mrs Featherstone a cheque.
MILTON HARRISON: You know sir, if the parliament gets a hold of this, they may publicise the fact that you made a favourable and sizeable cheque to one of your voters over the rest of them.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT DJUMBA: But isn’t Parliament quite weak? Don’t they pander to my every whim?
MILTON HARRISON: Still sir, over such an issue you don’t want to incentivise them. It’s like, if you give meat to a lion. You don’t want them to chew your hand off.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT DJUMBA: I know Milton, I can use my own funds to pay Mrs Featherstone. I must have a few million stashed away by now. I’ll write a cheque for half a million. That ought to cover it.
MILTON HARRISON: If you say so sir. It is most generous of you sir.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT DJUMBA: Well you know what they say Milton, if it doesn’t hurt it may as well be an empty gesture.
Milton hands President Bungle his cheque book and he writes a cheque.
MILTON HARRISON: President Bungle, before you retire for the evening there is the small matter of a contract to be signed.
He hands President Bungle a treaty and points to where it needs to be signed.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: What is it?
MILTON HARRISON: It’s a contract for three hundred state of the art bomber jets and three hundred fighter jets.
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: How big is the contract?
MILTON HARRISON: Six billion Bungles
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: How big is our Health budget?
MILTON HARRISON: Four Billion
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: How often have we used jets like this in the past?
MILTON HARRISON: Well Mr President as you well know, if we don’t have them we will be seen to be weak
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: I’m not signing the contract. Give the extra money to the health budget
MILTON HARRISON: Is everything alright sir?
FALLULAH AS PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Never been better. Now if you don’t mind I have to take a leak
Fallulah as President Bungle enters a bathroom before turning into a small bird and flying out the window. Once off the Presidential grounds she turns back to her former self. She is exhausted from her efforts and drops to the ground for a few moments.
INT. ELEVATOR IN ABANDONNED MULTISTOREY CAR PARK - EVENING
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Somebody farted. I can tell. My nostrils always flare up. Nothing gets past my nose undetected. Some say that I have the smelling powers of a sniffer dog.
IBRAHIM UTAKA: Shut up
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: I was only pointing out a pertinent fact.
INT. LEVEL 6 OF THE MULTISTOREY CAR PARK - EVENING
IBRAHIM UTAKA: Look master, we have brought you a very special gift
The leader of the anti-Bungles was seated on a couch with his back to the elevator while watching football on a television. Around him were eight other armed men.
KARL MANFORD: This better not be a waste of my time Ibrahim
The terrorists and their prisoner come into view.
KARL MANFORD: Well, well well, this is a surprise. I didn’t even know he was missing.
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Who are you?
KARL MANFORD: You are about to find out. Trust me, you won’t be disappointed.
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: If you lay a finger on me there will be repercussions the likes of which you have never seen. I will promise you a very slow and painful death
KARL MANFORD: You’re in a weak bargaining position.
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: The President of Bungle Bungle is never in a weak bargaining position. I know all the martial arts. I’m a gold belt in all of them. Do you know what a gold belt is? It’s ten times harder to get than a black belt. People go, there’s the guy with the gold belt. Some day I want to be as great as him.
KARL MANFORD: You wouldn’t win a fight with a ten year old
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: That depends on how tall he is. Is he under four foot six? Then I’d fancy my chances. I’d give him a bit of Tae Kwando, then a bit of Karate and then I’d finish him off with the old Jiu Jitsu.
KARL MANFORD: We don’t want anything from you. What we crave most is your head on a stick
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: I’m a good negotiator. I’m being modest. I’m the best negotiator the world has ever seen. I once persuaded the King of Ugadoubee to give me a 30% cut of his countries oil production as well as thirty of his finest cows in exchange for ten thousand acres of baren land and a Volkswagen Beetle. Of course I did also threaten to nuke him but that’s beside the point. I’m a great negotiator.
KARL MANFORD: Enough. I will phone Manuel. I’m sure you’ve heard of Manuel de Cordoba, the greatest torturer the world has ever seen.
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: Not personally, but I don’t think he could ever be as magnificent a torturer as me. I can out-torture anyone.
KARL MANFORD: Well we will find out. I’ll give him a call.
The Anti Bungle leader makes a call on his mobile.
KARL MANFORD: Manuel, it’s Karl. I have a job for you to do. You’re going to love it.
MANUEL DE CORDOBA: It better be better than this re-run of Dallas, I’m watching.
KARL MANFORD: It’s President Bungle
MANUEL DE CORDOBA: I’ll be there in five minutes.
The call ends
KARL MANFORD: While we’re waiting for Manuel to arrive, we’re going to have a little fun
CUT TO:
INT. LEVEL 6 OF THE MULTISTOREY CAR PARK
President Bungle, in his underwear is being held upside down with his ankles tied to a steel frame.
PRESIDENT BUNGLE: I’ll do anything you say. Not this torture. I am the bravest man that ever lived but no man can handle this.
KARL MANFORD: Relax. We still haven’t got to the tarantula’s or the hot iron poker. And by that time Manuel will arrive and he will have some other exciting activities to put you through.
INT. MA BEANFIELD'S HOUSE - NIGHT
Fallulah arrives home to see only, Ma Beanfield, Trixie Beanfield and Bethany Beanfield
MA BEANFIELD: Where have you been? I’ve been worried sick. Where are the others? I’m going to heat up your food
FALLULAH: The others didn’t return?
MA BEANFIELD: You mean, you don’t know where they are?
FALLULAH: No
In the corner of the room is a television set. It shows a Presidential podium with no President
COMMENTATOR: Apparently, President Bungle has urgent matters to attend to. We are assured that he is in the best of health and that highly classified matters have delayed him
FALLULAH: I’d better go look for them
MA BEANFIELD: What about your food. You’ve got to eat.
Fallulah is already on her way out the door
EXT. OUTSIDE MA BEANFIELDS HOUSE
Fallulah runs down the street, finds a quiet place and turns into a bird once more.